“Hooray!” you’re all thinking. Almost two weeks with no posts….I’m sure you were all worried that I’d died or gone to seminary without telling you. Of which I am more terrified I have yet to decide.
No, I’m very much alive…I think. It’s been up and down lately. Tired, energetic. Happy, sad. Mad, at ease. It was probably the stress of finals (I, throught the grace of God, passed math) mixed with the fact that I’m trying to live three lives at once: The Oswego/Character Counts! Life, the North Central student life, and the someday-seminarian life.
The Oswego/Character Counts! life has gone by the wayside while I’m trying to be at north central and, you know, pass college. Then the NCC life has sort of changed because I’m trying to meld it with the churchy life. It’s hard to get by sometimes…especially when the people around here can’t understand it all. That’s mostly my fault, though, since I can make myself understand this stuff so how am I supposed to explain it to those closest to me? I’m confident that I’ll get through. I’m confident because I am praying about it. Prayer is the way. I’m realizing that, in this case, Google can’t give me the answers I am seeking.
I know that God hears me.
Tonight, I sat in my room pouting about this and pondering about that, when suddenly in began to rain. The first rain of spring. Drenching, cooling; refreshing. That’s how I know God can hear me. He sent rain and thunder and lightning to tell me he’s there; to tell US he is there. God is letting us know that after a long, hard, and cold winter, he is breaking through the gray and washing away the gloom with the brilliant light of our transfigured Lord.
I always look forward to this part of year. This time when people can stop to talk on the sidewalk because it’s no longer -126 degrees outside and driving into the sunset becomes a reality. Cruising with the windows down and the radio up; laughter in the air. Late nights at Sonic and Chili’s and early mornings at the festival grounds.
I hope really hope that all of this gets figured out soon, but I know that it will. I just have to focus on the true meaning of Lent: Penance, Charity, and Service. Moving toward God and learning to integrate my three lives into one with God………WOULDN’T THAT BE A FEAT.